I am adamantium

8 August 2015

So I’m still trying to be positive and it’s hard, I want to be, but I struggle....I think that this will be my life for the next little while! Dave Larsen wrote me and I had a kinda cool thought — so what he said was about looking and seeing about what God sees and what we see and this is what I thought of: I think I'm starting to do that, I'm looking and trying to see and many a time I am quite far off from what God wanted me to see in that case. And right now with all that is going on in my life with the trials I am having I feel like I need to be asking God more and more what it means and what I am to do because of what I have received, which is hard and scary because sometimes God answers our prayers even when we sometimes ask and really don't want it, and just have to ask because it is what God wants me to do. I hate it and it is hard, but it is what I've learned that God wants me to change and he knows that I am not clay, I am adamantium (fictional metal alloy appearing in American Marvel comic books) and the only way that he is going to make this gross block of metal into the beautiful masterpiece that he sees in his head is put in the fire and purify it and then when he can he will strike it with the hammer until the he can as all great craftsmen turn me in to something absolutely beautiful, that no one could have ever imagined coming from the lump of dirt and ore that he started with. I just have to trust and put my faith that I can stand the fire and every blow that feels like it will destroy me, or be that blow that takes me from what I think I should be, a good lump of ore or even pure metal and then be his instrument! I don't know if that made sense, but it did to me and I know that God is wanting that for me — that I be better and become what he sees. I don't have his vision yet, but one day I pray that I will see it and have Him and his Son explain to me every trial and every fire.

So I'm in this kinda weird philosophical kind of mood I guess…I don't know….It's weird!

Sunday we went to church and had our normal meetings and talked about weekly plans, I had a really calm week planned so I wasn't really worried, so Sunday was just chill trying not to think to much.

Monday I think I tried to clean my office and it was bad!! My office has random stuff since even before my comp got here, so thats a little annoying, but whatever—life goes on I guess. Other then that we went out and opened the mouth a little and talked and it was nice!

Tuesday we did 3 gringos visa work or tramitez for them, it was fun to chat about what stuff they had that I didn't even know existed, and one kid made a cake for all of us so that was cool. We just did all their stuff way quick, usually it is like until 11am and we finished theirs at 9:40am, so that was way cool! Then I drove on an Argentine freeway going about 140 kmph and it was crazy, that was like traffic speed and it was kinda fun, but scary at the same time!

Wednesday was the same thing -- lots of planning and working! Losing myself in the work should be easy!

Thursday —  way easy day just working in the office some more trying to get organized so that I can work more effectively and planning some stuff I need to get done and be ready for.

Friday I planned dates for 20 peoples tramitez and possibly discovered a better way of doing tramitez then we have done them in the past. So it requires two days and people have to come down to me to visit to do it — so what I do is go to two places one day and then on the second day we go to Migracions and get it all finished. But in-between that we have to wait five days for that to be processed, so it’s like we can do one half and never get around to the other half, and that is really hard! Then when we have all that, we have to be getting turns to go to these places. If I spend about 10 dollars more per person I can do this process in two days while they are with me, and if I can do that they will get legal more quickly! The problem is that I still need to get everything to line up so that it can work. So I'm going to do everything I can to make this work and I'm going to beta test it the second week of September — I think because that is kinda the first chance I will have to do it all. Until then I already have it all planned so I just have to wait and get it done. 

Saturday we played some way good soccer and then some football and it was fun! Now I'm just waiting for my giant burger to arrive so I can chow down like crazy! My camera is dead so probs no photos this week, but don't stress I'm going to get better at this I promise!!! 

I love you guys a ton, be safe!

Love, Elder Jayson Benedict